Fissiksman's FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)
1. Yoo don't spel so goode.
2. Where were you born?
3. What inspired you to teach physics?
4. Are your children "physicists"?
5. What is the significance of saying "Your mom" and having seemingly adopted it as your trademark slogan?
6. Would this happen to be a mating call?
7. If not, then would we be correct in assuming that you suffer from some sort of twisted Oedipus complex where you lust after other people's mothers and not your own?
8. What is your favorite food?
9. Is this required for sustenance?
10. So you have a heart?
11. What do you think of our nation's government?
12. Why are you obsessed with Larry the Cucumber?
13. Does Larry's secret identity as Larry Boy mirror any secret identities you may have?
14. Do you IM?
15. If you had to choose only one place to insert a catheter, where would that be?
16. What is your IQ?
17. What does xxoo mean and why do you end your emails like that?
18. What made you think you could design a web page?
19. Any more info on you, for blackmail purposes, of course!?
20. When is your Bible study?
21. So if you're a science guy, how can you be religious?
22. What is a world view?
23. You mean you have scientific problems with evolution?
24. But aren't there like all kinds of problems with the Bible?
25. What about when bad things happen to good people?
26. Jesus never thought he was, God, though - others put that on him later, right?
27. Aren't all religious views basically saying the same thing?
28. How do I submit a question for here?
1
your mom. OK, so I spell fissiks like I like it - sue me. No, don't - I've been sued often enough as it is - just take both dollars now. Long ago, in a land far, far away, I needed a unique screen name - that's the one I picked, and it stuck. It's unique enough to be rememberable too, so don't forget it!
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2
I was born, just outside my mother's womb, in a delivery room of Immanuel Hospital on Ames Street in North Omaha, Nebraska, USA, North American Continent, Eastern hemisphere, planet earth, our solar system, milky way galaxy, somewhere in the midst of an apparently expanding universe.
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3
My parents used to rock me to sleep each night with these really big rocks, so you could say I had an early appreciation for inertia... then when I found out I could actually throw and shoot things at my students and not only not get into trouble but get paid for it, well... that the type of perk you only dream of! Physics is just the most fun because it is everything you've always done, without knowing you were doing it or why.
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4
They are both legends in their own minds... mind you, egos like theirs could ONLY be hereditary... (I blame those maternal genes.) Both show definite proclivities for the sciences and love to learn, but my son has always shown a more pronounced interest in projectile motion, starting with that hammer to the head incident with his sister when he was only one... you gotta be proud when they are so precocious!
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5
"Your mom" happens to be an insult of grandiose proportions. Ask anyone. Go up to a complete stranger and say "your mom" and see what happens. It's magical. It all started when someone in class that had the nerve to think HE was the center of the universe (when it is OBVIOUSLY me) was vainly attempting to engage me in a battle of wits. Rather than battle an unarmed man, I defused the situation with a quick, "your mom" which is the perfect reply to anything, since it is so unanswerable. (Really, people try to counter with, "Oh yeah, well YOUR mom!" but that's the first step into a vacuous existence, isn't it?) The room generally explodes as if I had actually said something witty or intelligently funny. High school humor is really a fine art not well understood by the masses. Come to my seminar next Tuesday and I'll explain.
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6
Only to a confused dad who is really nearsighted.
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7
While most mothers are unnaturally attracted to me, for obvious reasons, the converse is not always true. Other people's mothers tend to have burly, hand-gun-toting plebians nearby, and it best not to anger them. I do love my own mother, but I think Freud was a bit..... confused? Clearly Oedipus did NOT have an Oedipal attraction to his own mother, in the Freudian sense anyway - did you see what he did when he found out that was his mother? And they say movies are bad today! Ouch! Nope... too painful, so I opt for a normal relationship with good ol' mom. All of them.
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8
Chocolate
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9
It's much more important than that! Chocolate satisfies on many different levels, and there are so many types for the various needs. Chocolate people know what I'm saying. I should own stock in Toblerone! Unfortunately, I must eat other things also, or I get really wired, and my heart does the rhumba.
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10
your mom.
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11
Our nation has a government? Oh yeah, those crooks that promise both sides of every coin and actually just serve themselves! Well it DOES keep a lot of lawyers off the streets, so it's not all bad.
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12
Obsessed? I'll show you obsessed! Wait till you see my collection of....um, Marvin the Martian. Larry is incredibly cute, naive, talks funny, acts silly and generally is a nice guy, um... cucumber. And he really accomplishes a lot with no limbs, so I gotta think this is a real role model for today's youth. I love fun, creative things that appeal to a wide age group. Big Idea is filled with people I'd like to hang with....
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13
Ask Alfred... he's the only one who really knows. (I DO so love spandex, you know!)
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14
Do I IM? Yeah, back 15 years ago, now it's Facebook, where you can find me as fissiksman, of course! I don't initiate conversations much 'cause I don't want to seem like I'm stalking anyone, but I'd love it if you pop in with a word, a joke, a golf date or even a problem. If I blow you off, it's probably because you're still in high school, and there is a school policy against that...
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15
Do I get to pick the person, or is this to be self-inflicted, 'cause the answer shifts dramatically on that point!
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16
I think the entire concept of the IQ is based on flawed ideology that is racist and deterministic, built up by people who want to dominate other people. That said, mine IS fabulously high, and so I get to rule the world! Yea me! Seriously, I think it's a 69, the borderline between idiot and moron (which are actual medial definitions from the heyday of IQ testing.)
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17
x's and o's stands for hugs and kisses - I'm not really sure which is which... I send them to everyone - even the principal! so when you get them, it doesn't mean an unnatural attraction is forming (Put down that shotgun!) and I'm not hitting on you, but I do still love you.
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18
That's the real beauty of the internet, now isn't it? ANYONE can post an opinion! even an idiot like me! About a week before school started in 2001, I decided (mostly to avoid yard work) to learn myself HTML, 'cause I like to know how things work... so I looked up some stuff, zapped a few pages I liked and started in... I know it's not as professional as if I would use a web page producer like Front Page, but I like the charm of the kindergarten look! and my wife hates it when she pulls up these pages of code by accident!
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19
apparently, you missed my bio page - go back to the main site page, and click on the "it's me" link, silly!
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20
At the moment, my Bible study is with college kids at Grace, but I'd still love to open up a dialogue with you. You've got questions, God's got answers! We can do it by email, or set up a face-to-face to handle it. I'm not into arguing semantics or bashing religions, but if you have honest questions about God and Jesus and what the Bible says, I can probably answer anything you throw at me. It's a good challenge for both of us! Email me at QandA@stevepaulson.com
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21
a common misconception, actually. I think the fact that I am a science guy makes me a better Christian, and my belief in God certainly make me a better scientist. I think, argue and work through problems logically, trying to keep the emotional aspects out of the decision-making processes. Feelings obviously are in there, but the Truth, if it exists, should easily stand up to honest inquiry, which it does. I believe what I believe not because it was handed to me by my parents, culture or someone I am impressed with, but because it has withstood and been strengthened by my deep poundings. I naturally am a skeptical person. My first inclination in every situation is to doubt, and to force someone to prove it to me. I have been skeptically inquiring into religion in general, and the Bible in specific for about 25 years now, and I can say without hesitation that the only religion that stands up to an honest, direct look at the facts, is a belief in the God described in the Bible. And you can't read it without understanding the people to whom it was written, and the mindset they had; in other words, it doesn't matter what those words mean to me, in this century, but what did they mean to the people to whom they were written, in theirs? Only then do we get a true look at what it all means. It takes some study, but you don't get mislead by all the crap out there, and there are LOTS of crap salesmen...
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22
A world view is the framework through which you see your world, and the mesh you place your version of reality into. When we find things that fit our world view, we like them and we place them in their niche. When things that we learn conflict with our worldview, we tend to reject them as stupid, foreign or strange, and usually just end up rejecting them, often without seriously considering them. There are several world views, and minor variations within them. Not understanding your world view, or worse yet, not even realizing you HAVE one, is the basis for much misunderstanding and misinformation. Just so you know, my world view is that there IS a creator God who make us perfect, and we blew it, but He is calling us back to Him, at His price, not ours. Basically the framework from which the Bible speaks. I reject the idea that life is a cosmic accident that occurs as a result of random chance, and I equally reject the idea that life is full of spirits in trees, animals, and horoscopes, stars and spirit guides to aid in our life. Both do not stand up to scientific scrutiny.
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23
oh yeah! If evolution was not really a spiritual viewpoint, it would have died years ago scientifically. But to someone who is committed to the worldview that there IS no God, then evolution is the ONLY explanation possible, no matter how untenable, so it comes down to faith: do I believe that there is no god, even though all scientific evidence says that life could never arise from non-life naturally? or do I close my eyes and say that we just don't understand - later we may find out more information that proves us correct. That is not science, nor is it open-mindedness. Open mindedness says that all possibilities are possible - the evolutionist says there is no God, not based on evidence, but as an assumption going in, so no matter how much the evidence points toward a Creator - and 99% of it does - you cannot look there, you have to keep the faith that evolution is the answer... Ask any evolutionist if it is even possible that in all we do NOT know if there is room for a god, and how much evidence would be needed to compel him to believe. A quick way to check - look at anyone criticizing the creationist viewpoint - if the evidence was there - they would just present it and the case would be over, but instead, the appeal is always to the team: "ALL educated people believe this to be true... ALL scientists know this is the truth" et cetera. "Be on the winning side - don't be thought a simpleton!" is what they are saying, and it works, since no facts are placed out to be examined. When you analyze the actual facts involved, you see why the arguments are all emotional appeals, and why I am a creationist. If you want to examine the facts yourself, I have some great books, web sites, et cetera - write and I'll send some references appropriate with your educational level. I know you can think for yourself, and will choose where the facts naturally lead - as I did.
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24
I get this all the time, and it too stems from listening to "experts." If you read a heretic you respect say that the Bible (which you have never read) is full of errors, you take him at his word, without doing any serious investigation yourself. Cheap scholarship. I can rip to shred 99.9% of the "contradictions" listed by the heretics. Are there things we do not completely understand? Sure - the Bible was written a long time ago to a culture very different from our own, so it is easy to interpret it in light of our views, not theirs... I once read a letter from my dad, where he described his disgust at seeing his brother "sucking on a faggot." Now in today's terms, you can see that differently than it was intended when written, when a faggot was slang for a cigarette... Which is the correct interpretation? Obviously the one in which is was written is the correct one, and trying to interpret it any differently is academically dishonest to the text, but that very thing is done, both out of ignorance, and out of malicious intent. Being a serious scholar, I want to know the culture from which the text sprang, to avoid such dishonesty, and to read the thoughts as they were intended. Again, if you have problems about any Biblical issue, I can either answer them directly, or point you to some excellent reading material that addresses your concerns.
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25
Um, they don't. I'm NOT saying that when bad stuff happens, it was because of something you did, I AM saying that no one is good. No one. God doesn't grade on a curve, He grades on absolutes. We are either perfect like He is, or guilty. And we are ALL guilty. It is only on this point that one can truly begin a journey to understanding God. We like to think "Well, I haven't killed anyone..." and so God is somehow obligated to take us. He's not - if He were just truly Just, interested only in true justice - punishing the guilty - we'd be in a world of trouble. Luckily for us, He is loving toward His creation, and desires to give us another way to Him, through Jesus. I'm not making light of tragedy in the world, and there ARE great reasons why God doesn't presently step in and change all the evil into good - He will later - but the presence of evil does not negate God's existence - the Bible specifically addresses that we should expect evil, why it is there and what we should be doing about it in a coherent, satisfying way. We can talk.
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26
A lot of people try to say that, not reading the text as a Jew in the first century would, but as a novice skimming the text now would. Yeah, you can get that view if you have that preconception, and choose to ignore most of the evidence, but not if you look carefully, or not even that carefully. That Jesus called Himself God is evident by the number of times the Jewish rulers of the day accused Him of blasphemy... every time he called Himself the "son of Man" he was referring to the Messianic prophesy in Daniel 7, and Messiah is God. He accepted worship from others, while saying only God should be worshipped. He rose from the dead on His own power. He predicted the future with uncanny accuracy... I can sit down with you and go over tons of examples that show without a doubt that Jesus was either: A) a liar that was trying to convince others that He was God, B) A lunatic that believed He was God but was not, or C) He IS God. We have no other choices offered to us by the texts, including the popular view that Jesus was a great moral teacher. If he was not choice C), he was clearly no moral example for anyone...
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27
Almost yes...and way no. Some say there is no heaven, others there is. Some say there is no god, others, many gods, others, just one. But in how to get there, wherever THAT is, is where most religions DO have a lot in common... all religions except one are based in some way with mankind working their way to nirvana, nothingness or some sort of heaven, i.e. you get where you are going based on how good you are, or by what you do or do NOT do. So yeah, they are pretty much ways of saying that we should be good, and treat each other nicely, and the god of choice rewards that. Problem is, according to both the Bible and my personal experience, they are all wrong. Yeah, pretty radical stuff. True biblical Christianity says that we do NOTHING toward our salvation - it is a gift from God, payed IN FULL by the Messiah on the cross. Someone had to pay the price for our sins to satisfy God's Justice - we can, and should, or Someone else could step into our place and pay it for us... Jesus continually points the way to Himself as the only bridge between God and man. Being good is a natural response of the faith we have in Jesus. Doing good things is done to please the God that has already saved us and loved us, not to appease an angry God dangling you over hell if you say one thing that trips the balance out of your favor. If you are not acquainted with the Bible - come get a copy from me - free! Start off reading John's gospel - it's a great starting point if you know little and want to know more. Understanding that the Father has completely forgiven me changed me forever, and makes me want to please the One who saved me from myself.
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28
email me... QandA@stevepaulson.com - if I think it's worth everyone else's perusal, I'll include it - otherwise I'll just answer you directly. I WILL answer all questions sent to me... if you just want to argue, I have better things to do with my time, but if you are sincerely looking for Truth, I'll help guide you to Him.